Scene: 6:15 a.m. My bedroom. I am asleep. My three-year-old child enters from the bathroom.

 

CHILD (stage whisper): Mommy!

ME: ...What?

CHILD: Know why I didn't flush?

ME: ...Why?

CHILD: So it wouldn't wake you up.

 

He goes back to bed.

Fin.

Mollie Wilson O’​Reilly is editor-at-large and columnist at Commonweal.

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